Stop Setting and Forgetting: The Key to Achieving Your Goals with Clarity and Consistency
From Frustration to Clarity: How Breaking Big Goals into Small Steps Transformed My Year
Introduction: The Yearly Ritual of Planning
In my life, I’ve grown accustomed to taking time at the beginning or end of the year—preferably December or sometimes January—to plan for the upcoming year. It’s not about starting afresh with new resolutions. Instead, I modify my approach. Resolutions or setting goals aren’t new to me; I set goals every day. Yet, by mid-year, I often feel confused and lost. I feel as though I haven’t achieved anything worthwhile. The cycle of frustration and stagnation has been repeating for years.
There’s a saying: Insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting a different result. While we often quote this, how often do we truly apply it? For many years, I’ve fallen into the same trap. Every year, I diligently write down my goals and plans in a notebook, feeling excited and ready for the New Year. But why do I consistently end up feeling lost? Why does my motivation falter so quickly?
The Pattern of Ambition and Frustration
I’ve realized that I often set grand, ambitious goals—like making a million dollars or landing a dream position—and picture myself achieving them within months. I imagine myself progressing rapidly, but inevitably, the plans fall apart. I’ve tracked this pattern over the years. The goals remain consistent, but so does my inability to achieve them.
Turning Point: A Conversation That Changed Everything
Last year, before the New Year began, I was talking to my best friend, who also happens to be my girlfriend. She has seen this pattern repeat itself many times. When she noticed my frustration again, she asked me what was wrong. I poured out my feelings, explaining the situation. Together, we looked at my goals, and she made me realize something I had never thought about before.
I’m the philosophical one in our relationship. I pride myself on being thoughtful and reflective. But my girlfriend pointed out a flaw in my approach: while setting ambitious goals is great, I wasn’t starting small. I didn’t have clear steps or actionable milestones to guide me.
For example, I once bought a course that outlined steps to success. The material promised that I could achieve a significant financial breakthrough in just three months. But in reality, success isn’t just about following a set formula. Persistence, gradual growth, and adaptability are crucial. I had to ask myself: Do I understand the steps required to achieve my goals? Do they align with my personality, my time, and my current commitments?
The Problem with Big Goals: Lack of Clarity
I realized that I was too focused on the end result—like landing ten clients or making $100,000 in a few months—without considering the process of getting my first client. I wasn’t breaking down the steps into manageable pieces. I needed to set smaller milestones, such as earning my first $1,000 outside of my job, and figuring out the actions required to achieve that.
My girlfriend helped me understand the importance of clarity. I needed to ask myself:
What are the minimum resources I need to start?
Do I have the tools, like a phone, email system, or website?
What’s my strategy? How many people will I reach out to in a week?
How does this plan fit with my current commitments, like my full-time job?
These realizations helped me redefine my approach. I shifted from setting unrealistic goals to focusing on clarity, breaking tasks into manageable pieces, and understanding the steps I needed to take.
The Shift: A New Approach to Goal-Setting
This year, my planning process has evolved. I’m now focusing on three to five core goals that will set the tone for the year. I’ve identified my motivation and purpose behind each goal, ensuring they are clearly defined. I’ve broken them into quarterly milestones and detailed weekly and monthly action steps. For example, I calculate how much time I can realistically dedicate to these goals, even while juggling other responsibilities.
The Breakthrough: Don’t Set and Forget
Change is hard. I’m still fighting against old habits and systems, but things are improving. One major insight I’ve gained is the importance of not setting and forgetting.
In the past, I would write my goals in a notebook and never revisit them, treating them like an afterthought. But think about it: would anyone set a destination in Google Maps and then throw their phone in the drawer? No. You keep the map in front of you, regularly checking the directions. If you miss a turn, you reroute. Goals should be treated the same way. You need to revisit them daily, keeping them in sight and adjusting as necessary.
Now, I make it a habit to review my goals daily, just as I check social media or look in the mirror. This daily engagement helps me stay aligned and motivated. It felt strange at first, almost like staring at something unfamiliar. But it works. When I look at my goals regularly, they guide me, remind me of my purpose, and keep me accountable.
Conclusion: Persistence Over Perfection
The key takeaway for me this year is to not set and forget. Instead, I’ve learned to actively engage with my goals, make adjustments when needed, and approach them step by step. This practice ensures I’m always moving forward, even if progress is slow.
So, let’s not just set goals and forget them. Let’s keep them visible, treat them as dynamic, and allow ourselves to adapt as we go. Progress is not about perfection; it’s about persistence.